What ticks me off is the conflation of what people are with what they do.
For Pete's sake! This is elementary parenting here! Anyone with any ounce of parenting understanding here knows that you should always remark on the choices or the behaviour, but not the underlying character of the actor.
That is: it doesn't matter whether the person is fundamentally good, bad, nice, horrid, tolerable, intolerant, an ass, whatever. (Well, it does, but not in the realm of situations like this.)
What matters is that this "fundamentally nice person" seems to have committed actions that were unwelcome, specifically prohibited, potentially criminal, and certainly unpleasant and damaging.
It's the actions that are issue, not the person's character. The person should be held accountable for their actions.
(And it's also for this reason that I'm not personally a fan of zero-tolerance policies: as long as you address the actions/behaviour and not the person, you have to admit for the possibility of redemption, learning, and change, but still, that doesn't mean you foolishly give people free reign when they say "I've learned! I'm a new person!")
no subject
For Pete's sake! This is elementary parenting here! Anyone with any ounce of parenting understanding here knows that you should always remark on the choices or the behaviour, but not the underlying character of the actor.
That is: it doesn't matter whether the person is fundamentally good, bad, nice, horrid, tolerable, intolerant, an ass, whatever. (Well, it does, but not in the realm of situations like this.)
What matters is that this "fundamentally nice person" seems to have committed actions that were unwelcome, specifically prohibited, potentially criminal, and certainly unpleasant and damaging.
It's the actions that are issue, not the person's character. The person should be held accountable for their actions.
(And it's also for this reason that I'm not personally a fan of zero-tolerance policies: as long as you address the actions/behaviour and not the person, you have to admit for the possibility of redemption, learning, and change, but still, that doesn't mean you foolishly give people free reign when they say "I've learned! I'm a new person!")